Kahani kaafi filmy hai

Oct 1999
My papa bought me my first computer as graduation gift.

Sometime in 2001
Initial excitement of new computer dies. I started looking for new things to try. I signed up for something called e-mail buddy (first transition from pen-friend, precursor of networking as well as matrimony sites). I received lots of 'wannabe friends' type mails from frustrated guys, but I also got a handful of nice real pen-friend style mails from guys and girls from different parts of India and even other countries (I am still friends with 5 of them and have met 2 till date).

March 2002:
I got the first e-mail from one of the above mentioned '2'. It was a simple mail showing interest in 'talking' and not dating. For some reason I found the simplicity interesting and honest and I replied. My reply was still full of sarcasm. The response was a one liner but a complete check-mate one liner. I was super impressed. Regular exchange of e-mail starts, then starts chatting (ah, old yim days!). Within few months we were fast friends. We still didn't know each others' real name.

August 2003
I moved to US. I had very few friends and no family in US at that time. My friendship with my anonymous e-mail buddy (AEB) became even stronger as he was also in another part of US. AEB helped me with buying calling cards, laptop and many such things that fresh-of-the-boat Indian students need help with. One day I gave my phone number to AEB because I desperately needed some advice (again to buy something online). AEB called. It was weird to talk for the first time. But then gradually we started calling regularly. It was fun to discover how much we had in common. By now we also knew each others' first name.

December 2003
It was winter vacation and I had nowhere to go. AEB had forced vacation and was planning a Florida trip with friends. His friends canceled last minute and somehow jokingly it was decided that AEB will come and meet me in snowing Ohio!! For the first time we asked each others' full real names.
I thought my parents will kill me. But surprisingly they said ok [I guess they trust me more than I think they should :) ]. I was prepared with knives in my cupboards in case a weirdo turns up.
AEB showed up. After a few awkward minutes it seemed like we were meeting some old-time friend. He stayed in a hotel in town for few days and kept visiting me everyday. Before he left for home, we more or less confessed how much we like each others' company :)

Jan 2004-July 2005
'Confession of likeness' turned into 'let's give this relationship a try' that then turned into 'looks like this might work, we need to tell parents'. All this while living 2000 miles apart, with occasional weekend trips across the country.

July 2005
Parents were notified and luckily they seemed more than happy. However, long-distance relationship continued.

August 2008
I finally finished grad school and moved to the other side of the country. Parents were really excited and demanded instant wedding. I still needed a new visa to visit India. So parents' were snubbed every time marriage was mentioned.

July 2009
My petition for new visa gets approved.

December 25th, 2009, 12.20am (Indian-Standard Time)
I am sitting in my parents' house in India, in front of the same very first computer, blogging with hands full of mehendi. In 5 hours, I leave for another part of India. In 2 days, I get married to my anonymous e-mail buddy, my best friend, my boyfriend, my fiance and my soon-to-be husband........J.


Note: This is the 100% honest version of this story and only J and I knew this version, until right now. :)

Staycation

I am taking couple of days off from work this week. Nothing special. I haven't had a proper vacation since Dec 2007, I didn't get to take a proper break between finishing my PhD and starting my postdoc, and I didn't take any days off since then either. I had to work from home even during the mandatory winter break. So I am really exhausted. I would like to take a month off and go home, but can't do that because of visa issues :( I wanted to go for a vacation within US, but J can't take time off right now. This week things were little less hectic at work. So I decided to take it easy and use couple of my earned leave days that will become invalid in 2 months and just do nothing :D My labmate told me that it's called staycation :)

So for the past 2 days I am having a perfect staycation. I am getting up late, sitting on my couch most of the day, checking my work mail only twice a day and responding to only urgent stuff, doing very little work related stuff, watching lots of TV, surfing the net all day with no particular goal, and even taking afternoon nap :D

I am really bored now and want to do something more productive. I hope I can do something fun over the weekend. For now, I'll start with doing a loooooong tag that has been making rounds on facebook and blogger :)

1. Last beverage – Thai Iced tea – last night with dinner. I don’t usually drink morning coffee or tea.

2. Last phone call- Mom
- again last night

3. Last text message – Can’t remember. I rarely use text messaging



4. Last song you listened to – Bruises-by Chairlift



5. Last time you cried – Around two weeks ago. I cry all the time :)

HAVE YOU EVER.



6. Dated someone twice? – No



7. Been cheated on? – I hope not.


8. Cried yourself to sleep? – Many times. Told you, I am a cry baby :)

9. Lost someone special? – Yes.

10. Been depressed? – Not seriously depressed, just the regular sad phases that most people go through at some or other points in their lives. I bounce back pretty quick though.

11. Seen ghosts – No :)

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS.



12. Black


13. Grey


14. Blue




(yeah I’m quite boring)

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU.



15. Made new friends – It takes me a long time to call anyone ‘friend’ but yes, I made new acquaintances. 


16. Fallen out of love – No and hope I don’t :)

17. Laughed until you cried – Not really :)



18. Met someone who changed you – It’s impossible to change a perfect person :p

19. Found out who your true friends were – I think I already know.

20. Found out someone was talking about you – Yes, but nothing bad. Just two common friends talking about others in the group.



21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list – Yeah. My boyfriend is on my friends’ list you see.



22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life – I don’t add strangers, although there are few people whom I haven’t met in person, like J’s family members and some friends’ friends whom I have some good reason to interact with.

23. How many kids do you want to have – Maximum one. The world population is too high already. Besides, I am too lazy to take care of anyone. Taking proper care and giving right guidance to even one kid sounds like a huge responsibility to me!

24. Do you have any pets – No. As I said, I’m too lazy and afraid of taking responsibility of another life. I can’t even keep all my plants alive!

25. Do you want to change your name – Not really. I will loose my identity if I do so now. Besides, it’s pretty uncommon, which I like and it has a nice sentimental story attached. But if I can go back in time when my dad chose my name, I would ask him to think of a shorter and universal name :)

26. What did you do for your last birthday – Went to work. No one at work knew it was my birthday as I had joined 2 weeks ago and I don’t like to announce my own birthday. Evening was good as J brought me flowers (for the first time!!..faintly hoping not for the last time) and a chocolate cake and then took me out for dinner.

27. What time did you wake up today – 9.30 am. As I mentioned I am taking the day off from work. So there was no need to get up early :)

28. What were you doing at midnight last night – Watching Jay Leno.

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for – Get my new visa and go home. Haven’t gone home for 3 years and haven’t seen my parents for 1.5 years!!!

30. Last time you saw your father – Nov 8^th 2007, when my parents were going back to India after spending two wonderful months with me.

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life – I think I am quite fortunate for having a pretty decent life. The only thing that will make it perfect is if I had control over each and every aspect of it :)

32. What are you listening to right now – Sound of the ticking wall clock.

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom – I can think of two right now.

34. What's getting on your nerves right now? Waiting for my new visa.

36. Whats your real name – Can’t tell here :)

37. Relationship Status – In a relationship.


38. Zodiac sign – Leo.

39. Male or female – Female



40. Natural Hair color? – Black.

41. Hair color now – I don’t color my hair. Main reason, I am usually too lazy to spend time on looking good. Secondly, the amount of ammonia and peroxide in those colors make me very nervous.

42. Pet Peeve – Irresponsible people, ever-complaining-ever-unhappy people.

43. Need Glasses- Surprisingly no, even after spending most of my open-eye times reading, or peeping through microscope lenses in dark rooms or staring at a computer or TV screen :)

44. Long or short – I need a more specific question than that.

45. Height – 5’ 3”



46. Do you have a crush on someone – I think I am too old to have romantic crushes. Now I only admire fine men if I rarely see one :)

47. What do you like about yourself? – Hmmm where do I start…

48. Piercings – Ears..that’s it.


49. Tattoos – No thank you.

50. Righty or lefty – Righty.

FIRSTS.



51. First surgery – None so far, thankfully.


52. First piercing – Ears. I must be 2-3 years old. I hardly remember anything about it.

53. First tattoo – Never.

54. First best friend – I don’t remember. We moved from one place to another too often when I was a kid and I can’t remember the friends I made between ages 1-5. The only friend from that age who is still a very good friend is a guy who lived next door to my grandma’s house.

55. First sport you joined – I was never too fond of sports. My earliest memory of being part of any sports would be playing cricket and badminton in the colony when I was 6-8 years old.

56. First pet – I got two gold fishes as gift once. Do they count as pet?

57. First vacation – That would be a trip to parts of Tamil Nadu when I was about a year old. No, I do not have any memories of that vacation. I know because my parents have an album full of photographs from the trip and my mom still tells stories about what I was doing when we went to so and so places :)

59. First crush- S. Age 13. I think I mentioned about him in a earlier tag.

60. First alcoholic drink – I think it was Irish-cream.

RIGHT NOW.



61. Eating – Nothing.



62. Wearing – Navy blue gym pants and sky-blue t-shirt with my grad school’s name on it.

63. I'm about to – Eat lunch.



64. Speaking to – No one. I am alone at home.

65. Waiting to – Nothing. I have no rush, no plans today. Perfect staycation day :)



YOUR FUTURE.



66. Want kids? – I thought I wanted to, but I am getting unsure the more I think about it. Out of 4 of my closest girl-friends, N and L are single, D is married but fighting with parents and in-laws about why they don't want kids anytime soon, and M, who is married with a kid tells me never to get married and have kids because she feels trapped! Having such friends don’t help much :)

67. Want to get married? – I think so. Even though I keep getting cold-feet every now and then, I guess I want our families to be more comfortable with our relationship.

68. Careers in mind? – I already have a career. Now the only choice left is Academics or Industry.

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?



69. Lips or eyes – Eyes


70. Hugs or kisses – Hugs

71. Shorter or taller- Taller
than me, but not so tall that I feel like a dwarf next to him.

72. Older or Younger – Older


73. Romantic or spontaneous – Spontaneous


74. Nice stomach or nice arms – Nice stomach.

75. Tattoos or piercings- Preferably none. A tiny ear stud at max, if someone can carry it properly.

76. Sensitive or loud- Sensitive.

77. Hook-up or relationship – Relationship.

78. Trouble maker or hesitant- Trouble maker.




HAVE YOU EVER.



79. Kissed a stranger – No.

80. Drank hard liquor - Yes


81. Lost glasses/contacts – I don’t have any to loose. I almost lost my sun-glass few weeks ago in a fitting room. Fortunately remembered about it before leaving the store, and the dressing room lady still had them. From the look on her face, it looked like she was hoping to keep it for herself and was sad that I came back for it. The fact that she never made a lost-and-found announcement for half an hour supports my belief.

82. Sex on first date – No


83. Broken someones heart – I have said no to few guys. They seemed sad at that time, but don’t think anyone was seriously heart-broken. Most of them are married now and still friends, except one guy. He stopped all communication with me once he decided to get married. Most kiddish for a 28 year old, won’t you say?

84. Had your own heart broken – No, unless you count teenage crushes that never became anything more :)

85. Been arrested?- No.


86. Turned someone down – Yes.

87. Cried when someone died – Yes.

88. Got someone into trouble intentionally – No.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN.



89. Yourself – Very much, but not unrealistically. I am mostly aware of my capabilities and incapabilities.

90. Miracles – Not really. I believe what we call as a miracle is just an event that has low statistical possibility of happening. But if it happens, then there must be a logical explanation to it. Maybe we still don’t have all the tools to explain it yet, but there has to be a reason.

91. Love at first sight – Surely not for me. It might work for others.


92. Heaven – No.

93. Santa Claus – No :)


94. Kissing on the first date? - No


95. Angels – No. Selfless social workers come pretty close.




ANSWER TRUTHFULLY.



96. Is there one person you want to be with right now? – I am actually enjoying my rare day alone. But yes, it would be great if I could be at home with my parents now.

97. Had more than one boyfriend/ girlfriend at one time? – No



98. Do you believe its possible to remain faithful forever? – I think so. You can’t feel happily in love everyday of your life, but that doesn’t mean you have to find comfort in other people whenever you are unhappy with your current partner. Commitment and being faithful needs much more determination that being in love.

99. What's the one thing you cannot live without? – Oxygen :p

100. Posting this as 100 truths? - No.

Yaaay for Kris Allen

Even though the judges (except Randy) and producers were heartless towards you (and unfairly partial towards Adam) throughout the season, we were not :) We rooted and voted for you and........YOU ARE THE NEXT AMERICAN IDOL!!!!!!!! Hope you believe in yourself little more now and come up with some amazing records soon. Congrats Kris!!

---

Looks like I am having really good musical times. Lot of my wishes have been coming true these days! :D

Since I was 15 years old, my favorite Indian singer has been Jagjit Singh. Attending his concert was one of the things I had on my 'must do before I die' list. For some or other reason I kept missing the opportunity to fulfill this wish...until May 2nd, 2009. Yes, I got to see him live in concert and in spite of his age and poor health, he still had the same amazing voice that my mom calls 'God's voice'. 

Last night my AI wish also came true. J has been rooting for Kris from the Top-36 episode. I can't say I was going crazy for him like J has been, but he was among my top 3, until my other favorites left quite early in the competition. I never liked Adam or Danny. They might be great singers but their kind of music is not something I listen to. But most of the world around me seemed to be in love with Adam. So I was really not very hopeful last night. But....HE WON!! 

And the happy musical times don't stop here. I am going to Coldplay concert in July!!!!!!!! Happy, happy, happy...I am one happy girl right now...at least if I don't think of anything other than music :)

Autopilot

I found this gmail ad to be hilarious. Apart from the sample mails, the response to 'What happens if a sender and recipient both have Autopilot on?' in the side bar deserves special mention.

Good to see that google engineers still have some sense of humor :)

Ignorant or utopian?

Like many other people who believe in scientific reasoning, I was shocked and angry after hearing the Pope's message in Africa on how to control AIDS. I kept thinking that how can a person whom a huge part of the world population considers their leader, can he be so ignorant to say that "condoms can be harmful rather than being useful in preventing the AIDS epidemic"?

Then yesterday when I was sitting in the train and watching the sunset, I remembered the words of a very religious friend of mind who feels that god paints these beautiful landscapes with his brush and colors. And this friend is actually a student of science. Then I suddenly realized that this whole Pope issue is not simple ignorance, it is actually a matter of belief. If someone believes that a disease is "god's punishment" and staying away from "sins" is the only foolproof way to not get sick, no wonder they will consider using protection to be a harmful thing. You see using protection gives freedom to do "sin" which means it will increase the chances of getting punished. Faith and belief does not need more logic than that. One just has to believe something in their heart and that becomes the truth.

I have nothing against religious people. Everyone has a right to choose what they want to believe and not believe. I just hope all his followers listen to every part of his suggestion. Those who stop using protection as per his instructions must also follow his suggestions of practicing abstinence, fidelity and heterosexuality. If they decide to follow only the first part, it is going to take a LOT of praying to cure a fatal disease like AIDS.

Sad

My beloved macbook died on me last week without any notice :((

I have to change the broken hard disk and it should be new again, but unfortunately it will be too new. None of the data can be recovered unless I pay $1-2K!! Thankfully I have not been a total idiot and kept backup of the important stuff that I cannot live without and some more. But still there's so much more one accumulates in 5+ years. Maybe they are not important, maybe I would have never opened most of those files, but still can't get over the sadness of loosing them. Wish I had invested on an automatic backup device. Sigh.

Reasons for not wanting to be married

According to 'The good wife's guide', I will have to follow these:

• Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.
• Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
• Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
• Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dust-cloth over the tables.
• During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
• Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
• Be happy to see him.
• Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
• Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
• Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
• Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.
• Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
• Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
• Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
• A good wife always knows her place.

I surely cannot be one ever..or even close :)

Replate

Just a little while back I was sitting outside and saw a homeless guy digging the nearby trash bins for leftover food. This made me immensely sad and guilty for being fortunate enough to have all the food I need to survive, and more.

Thanks to my mom, I have always been against wasting food. She taught me to always take only the amount of food I really can eat. I sincerely follow that rule and try to make people around me do that too. But there are times when we are forced to buy in big portions and then have no other options except throwing away the leftovers in the trash. Today's incidence made me think if we could throw those leftovers in a way that the poor homeless people can get them without digging through the rotten trash cans.

I started looking up on the net. Some people suggested offering the food to a homeless person directly. This did not seem very practical to me. Firstly, I will probably not have enough time or motivation to look for a needy person at the time I have that extra food. And even if I do, the person I offer it to might feel insulted.

After some more searching I found this very simple yet very nice idea called 'Replate'. To replate is to place the unwanted leftovers on top of the trash can that has a lid or next to it if doesn't have a lid. It will be nicer if it can be kept wrapped in a paper bag, say the bag in which the food came in originally.

There can be many critics and concerns about this practice. But until we find a better solution, this seems like a doable idea to me. If others agree with me, then from now on please remember to replate instead of throwing away those half eaten lunches.

And I need to breathe

It's only Monday night and I am already exhausted. I want to go to an oxygen bar and inhale some strawberry flavored oxygen :)

My best friend D suggested going to some random bar..the standard alcohol-serving type, getting seriously drunk and having an one-night stand with any random guy I meet in the bar. Who needs enemies when there are such friends around!!

Imagination is the key

"Imagination is more important than knowledge, for knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand."

--Albert Einstein.

Now I know why it is so difficult at times to do what I think should be easy to do. Imagination. That's what I need. 

Thank you sir for your great words of wisdom.